What Caregivers Really Need From Those Around Them
Caregiving often happens quietly, behind the scenes, and without much fanfare. A recent New York Times piece titled The Simplest Ways to Support the Caregivers in Your Life by Elizabeth Passarella shines a light on the everyday realities of caring for aging parents while still raising children—and, more importantly, on how friends can show up in meaningful ways. Through personal stories and expert insight, the article reminds us that support doesn’t have to be grand to be deeply felt.
Here are a few key takeaways that stood out to us:
Listening matters more than fixing. Caregivers aren’t looking for solutions as much as they are understanding. Being a safe place to vent—without offering advice unless it’s asked for—can ease loneliness and emotional strain.
Validation goes a long way. Simple messages like “I’m sorry” or “You’re doing a good job” may seem small, but they help caregivers feel seen and affirmed during exhausting, emotionally complex moments.
Be specific when offering help. Open-ended offers often go unanswered. Instead, suggesting a clear action and timeframe—dropping off a meal, walking the dog, or running an errand—makes it easier for caregivers to say yes.
Consistency beats a one-time check-in. Caregivers may not accept help right away. Continued, patient offers of support signal reliability and create space for them to ask when they’re ready.
Giving caregivers a break matters. Even short periods of respite can help prevent burnout. Stepping in to spend time with a loved one, when appropriate, benefits everyone involved—including the person receiving care.
The full article explores these ideas in greater depth through lived experiences and expert perspectives. It’s a thoughtful reminder that showing up for caregivers doesn’t require special training—just empathy, patience, and presence.
